One way companies can keep customers happy — maybe not loyal, but reasonably content — is responsive customer service, especially in small ways that matter. Here’s an example. This morning I sent my bank a simple question and here’s the response.

Two days to reply to a simple email question? Now there’s an area marketing should tackle.

In an age where people are tired of marketing hype and gimmicks, it seems odd that Verizon would decide to use a teddy bear as the spokesperson for its FiOs marketing campaign. What’s even odder is that the teddy Twitters, reaching an audience that is even more suspect of inauthentic marketing.

Jason Chupick of Campfire, the agency designing the campaign, explains in today’s PR Week:

“[We] needed a spokesperson, an ongoing voice that people will listen to because everyone is trying to come up with a novel Twitter campaign.”

If the teddy is really bizarre it just might become a viral hit. But sorry Verizon and Campfire, a teddy bear isn’t an a”voice” that this consumer is going to listen to, never mind take seriously.

When I called Andersen Windows today to make an appointment to get an estimate for replacement windows the sales representative asked me if my husband would be home for the appointment. “I don’t know. But one of us will juggle our work schedules to be home at that time.”

“So your husband will be there?” she asked, pushing it. “We’ll give you a $100 discount if your husband is there with you.”

What?! I’m so offended by Andersen’s approach. Am I the weak little Missus with no buying and decision power? (On the other hand, it might be that we women ask the good questions and bargain tough — and Andersen’s market research has found that the guys are pushovers.)

Nonetheless, the sales angle has backfired. I’ve shared this story with several people today, and now with you. Word of mouth at work.

I went through crazy hoops buying my first house as a young single woman 26 years ago. ( A network television affiliate even came out to do a spot because I was such a novelty.) House decision sexism was bad then. Today it’s unforgivable — especially as part of the sales process of a well known brand like Andersen.

   The buzz is that CBS may “divorce” itself from anchor Katie Couric long before her contract expires in 2011. What went wrong?

Maybe it has nothing to do with Katie Couric or the fact that people are tuning out of  television for their news.   Maybe it comes down to a Viagra problem.

Watching the evening news — CBS or the other networks — we are bombarded with ads for one medical ailment ad after another. Penile erection, bladder control, constipation, bone loss, arthritis, diabetes. What kind of customer experience is this? Terrible. Erections and constipation happy messages while trying to make dinner, and maybe catch up on the news.

CBS, like most companies, has different silos responsible for different functions, and no one organization is looking at the customer’s experience. CBS News is responsible for Katie & Co., while the advertising group is bringing in the television dollars — and the Viagra ads.

In many retail companies, marketing is responsible for branding while operations oversees the stores, and never the two shall collaborate, often creating a mixed message and uneven customer experience.  Similarly, customer service isn’t usually part of marketing, yet the customer service group often has more influence on customers than advertising, promotions, or pricing.

I hope CBS doesn’t put the blame for poor ratings on Katie Couric, a fine journalist. CBS has bigger issues; the customer’s experience matters more than the ad revenue. If the first is bad, the second will become disastrous.

The Sears brand has been dying in the hands of billionaire hedge fund manager Edward Lambert. Here’s why: Lambert has raised prices and slashed marketing budgets and capital spending. Plus Sears has no brand positioning for quite some time, even before the ill-fated merger with K-Mart.

Where does Sears fit among Wal-Mart, Target, Macy’’s? Who knows. It’s so sad. Sears at one point was such an American brand icon.

Chrysler CEO Bob Nardelli ’s poor communications judgment and skills hurt Home Depot’s reputation. But communications still doesn’t seem to be a priority for him. Rather than having corporate communications report to him, last month he put the organization under the human resources department, and the VP of communications resigned. ( I don’t blame him.)

This move signals that Nardelli doesn’t value communications — or thinks that he knows enough not to need a direct report in that function. Leadership is communications. Inspiring employees to act on ideas. Instilling confidence in partners. Building trust with the media and customers. Listening to disgruntled employees dealers and customers to get to root causes.

As Chrysler tries to make a comeback communication — not advertising — will be crucial. Methinks Nardelli is living in a bubble and when the bubble bursts he will again have egg all over his face.

Last May I wrote about an outrageous incident I experienced watching pharmaceutical marketing executives lying to their own employees.

Today, Advertising Age reports that Merck and Schering-Plough spent $100 million advertising the cholesterol drug Vytorin for a year, despite having findings that showed the drug didn’t deliver the results promised in the ad. That’s right one whole year of lying to consumers.

Maybe it’s time to end the direct-to-consumer pharmaceutical advertising.

Here’s an example of how good brands taint their reputations by not thinking through the customer buying experience.

For a post-Christmas gift I treated myself to a new Miele vacuum cleaner, which I LOVE — and this from someone who hates housework. But the process of buying this beautiful piece of German engineering was a truly frustrating experience.

After reading many reviews I went onto the Miele site and placed my order. The site was slow in loading, but I tried to overlook that. Real frustration set in after I filled out all the shipping, billing and credit card info and the Miele site kept giving me an error message. So I kept going back to the payment part of the process to try again. I then called the Miele customer service number but after waiting 45 minutes, hung up. Then I got an email message confirming my order and panicked, thinking maybe it had processed four or five orders. I called customer service again. No response. Now I’m hating Miele despite the glowing product reviews and decide to call it a day and try to resolve the issue the next morning.

The next morning before 10 a.m. UPS delivers my new vacuum cleaner. I was stunned (and thrilled) that the delivery came in less than 24 hours. And that I only received one vacuum.

Would I recommend a Miele? Yes and no. The product is amazing, but buying it was a challenge.

James Carville coined a mantra for Bill Clinton’s during his fist presidential campaign, “It’s the economy, stupid.” For marketers, let’s remember, “It’s the customer experience.”

Nothing gets people talking (and thinking) like a contrarian or counterintuitive point of view. A good example can be seen in a post today over at the Running a Hospital blog by Paul Levy, CEO of Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center in Boston. There’s a local hospital in financial trouble that none of the Boston-area hospital groups have the money to acquire and fix. Levy suggests an alternative — that the Service Employees International Union take over the hospital as they have a strong interest in hospital management and lots of cash.

“So why not approach SEIU with a proposal to have the union purchase, own and operate Carney Hospital? Let the union show how it can handle the full panoply of issues of running a hospital and demonstrate how it can profitably operate a neighborhood facility without the kind of state aid that has been pouring into Carney for all these years. Let the union negotiate contracts with the insurance companies, encourage access for low-income patients, maintain high regulatory standards for patient care, and do all the other things required of hospital management, while, of course, providing excellent working conditions for staff members and physicians.”

An innovative idea or a friendly smack at the unions who so often complain about how hospitals are managed? Hard to say, but Paul’s post will certainly be the topic of conversations in the Boston healthcare community this weekend. And there’s nothing healthier for any industry than frank, open conversations about contrarian ideas. That’s where change so often begins.

Thanks to Howard Kain, managing principal of the healthcare group at PNC for turning me on to Running a Hospital, a great example of CEO blogging — and in a highly-regulated, conservative industry like hospital management no less!

Cerberus announced today that former GE and Home Depot executive Bob Nardelli is taking over as CEO of Chrysler. And today the executive known for his arrogance and lack of effective leadership communications skills made his first misstep as CEO.

There’s a two-page Chrysler advertising spread in today’s Wall St. Journal proclaiming “The New Chrysler: GET READY FOR THE NEXT HUNDRED YEARS.” Gee, Bob, most new CEOs have a 100-day plan, but a 100-year plan? You’ve already been able to consult and collaborate with Chrylser employees, union officials, and partners and figure out the next 100 years? Puh-leeze. This is a stupid way to start and doesn’t help you overcome the credibility and arrogance problems that clouded your departure from Home Depot. Pull the ads before you have mud on your face.

What’s almost as dumb is what the ad says.

“A NEW ERA BEGINS WITH THE NEW CHRYSLER. Now, that sounds like the kind of news that would only pique the interest of the people on Wall Street, but we believe it’s going to be more important to the folks on Main Street. In short, it means that the New Chrysler is something of a rarity in today’s automotive world: a company that’s capable of quickly responding to the needs of customers. The fact is, we’ve always strived to be the most customer-focused car company on the planet.”

Maybe Bob, with his $200 million Home Depot severance package, has never bought a Toyota and Honda and experienced great customer service.

But I digress. The point is that when a CEO has credibility issues his communications advisers should help him or her not step back into them. Before there can be a new Chrysler there needs to be a new Nardelli who can earn the respect and trust of his new team.